My first week...

Ok...you've all experience hell as you know it...who hasn't. This week has been mine...I'm eight weeks old today..but I know hell...

Monday Matthew had to go to work...he seemed really hesitant...I cried and I cried and he hesitated and almost didn't go..but finally he just left me. Alone. I've never been alone in my life. And Matthew pulled a giant desk in front of his kitchen and just left me alone. I can't believe it...I want to leave, I'm going crazy and I will bark for six straight hours...I can't really bark, but my whining and puppy crying can be heard in the hallways and even at the sixth floor elevators. When Matthew came home he threw his arms around me and seemed so sad, upset and really felt bad. I don't care...he left me alone..I wonder if he knows I'll never forget that. Monday night a lot of people came to Matthew's apartment. He left from 6-7, actually..he seemed to be out of breath from running home from the subway station...he said he got home from downtown at his public school at 5:45 pm and could only see me for about 15 minutes before he had a class downstairs at 6pm. I don't know if I believe him...maybe he's with a different puppy...the bastard!! But he did come back..and early...I don't know how he left his class early..but he promises he quit that class..so we'll see. Then other people came to his home at 8pm..they were nice, one fat girl played with me a lot, and I had fun for the first 10 minutes. Then I got tired, so I slept on Matthew's feet while he talked and taught for another 50 minutes. As soon as those people left, they seemed like high schoolers, he played with me a lot until 9:30 when more people came, it was similar, they all were excited and played with me for about 15 minutes, then I slept on daddy's feet and he taught for a while. Now everyone is gone and daddy is feeding me. He took me to the animal doctor this morning, so I know he learned a few things about what I need. He's also reading the internet all the time trying to keep me happy and healthy, I hope he can figure it all out, it really is a lot. Tuesday, Matthew thought I might be happier in the bathroom, boy, was he wrong!! I barked and cried so loud, I think Matthew almost cried. I could see he was emotionally drained and really worried, I think he might have to give me back to my momma. But, I also see some deep determination in him..so..we'll see....he hasn't slept much the last two nights...I'm testing him by peeing and pooping outside of the bathroom where he put the training pads....I wonder if he'll give up...or if he can train me...